Marriage is anything but sentimental…


Rich and I love reading together.  We read through the Bible together.  Right now we’re in Romans.  We just finished James and boy did I learn a lot from that.  In fact, I realized something beautiful about Grace and the difference between that and Faith.

When Maxwell lived, we read through Job.  Who reads through Job?!  Not me.  And yet us.  And reading it after a tragedy, you understand it differently.  Yes, it’s still hard to read—but oh so worth it!

While Maxwell was in the hospital we reread the scriptures Richard preached on just mere days before our son almost died, “Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”  (NIV) 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18.

Did I mention this is what he preached on DAYS before our son nearly died?!  Can you imagine having to LIVE through those verses you just preached?

I couldn’t…yet we tried.

Some days we succeeded.  Other days we failed.  Ultimately, we came back to them when we still didn’t know Maxwell’s outcome in life.

Moral of that story, DON’T…absolutely DON’T preach on something if you are not prepared to live it!

Needless to say, reading the Bible together is a big part of our marriage.  No, a HUGE part of our marriage.

And reading other books—important too.

Right now we’re reading a book that we just started.  So to review it ahead of time would be unfair.  Therefore, I will just tell you I already LOVE what we’ve read.  And it’s basically an entire background of statistics and facts and thoughts and reviews.

Does this mean all of them are happy facts?  Heavens no.  But they help me understand marriage and the perception of marriage and how we, as a society, think or look at marriage.

We’re only 40 pages in…

But, what really drew me to the book in the first place was the back cover and these words, “I’m tired of listening to sentimental talks on marriage.  At weddings, in church, and in Sunday school, much of what I’ve heard on the subject has as much depth as a Hallmark card.  While marriage is many things, it is anything but sentimental…”

And I’ll leave it at that.

After all, like I said, we’re only 40 pages in.

But that alone was enough to get me started.  Truth, man.  Truth.

I, too, am tired about the beautiful Hallmark sentiments you see everywhere about marriage.

Marriage is real.

And real is real.

And life is real.

Which means sometimes messy.  And tough.  And rotten.  And wonderful.  And glorious.

And while it’s not all tornadoes and volcanic eruptions, it is also not all unicorns and rainbows.  It is just life.

Marriage is just like that.  Life.

Like I heard on the radio years ago when someone mentioned to the radio host, Delilah, how she (the caller) didn’t feel in love with her husband, this was Delilah’s response, “Love is not a feeling…I don’t always feel like getting up in the morning to make my children breakfast—but i do.  Why?  Because I love them…”  In marriage you won’t always feel in love, but that doesn’t mean you give up.  And it has stuck with me over many thousands of moon later (after all, there are 365 days in a year and largely at least a sliver of a moon over that time.  Then you have to add the years we’ve been married—we’ve made it into the thousands of moons, literally).

I love to read.  So reading this book is a pleasure.

And I love my husband.  So reading with him is a pleasure.

And, like I have mentioned so many times before, I love my marriage—but we fight hard to make it work.  So reading a book on marriage is a privilege.

One I’m glad I have.

In the meantime, stay tuned for the review once we’ve finished, and go ahead and read other recently posted and archived blogs while you’re at it.  After all, we love that you stopped by And 2 Makes Crazy.

We’re crazy about you!