An article from the Washington Post for ALL parents: unkindness vs bullying. A must read!

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I have often thought exactly as this woman has so adequately written.  This is a tough article that addresses bluntly the difference of unkind vs. bullying.  AND she clearly states how not addressing our children’s situations appropriately brings more harm to them than good.

She DOES NOT undermine or excuse unkind behavior.  She simply and CLEARLY states how there is a difference and it needs to be noted and children need to be taught how to deal with each situation appropriately for their well being and benefit.

There are so many truths in this, I wanted to underline them all.  Since I won’t be doing that for this post, I will simply encourage you (again) to click and have a read.

Here is a quote from the article, but, please don’t take this quote and run.  Click on the article and read it.  Reread it.  Read it carefully.  Can you tell I really think it is needed for you to read it?!

“Someone can be insensitive, thoughtless, immature, mean and even aggressive without it being bullying. And it’s important to make sure children understand that. Here’s why: For the rest of their lives, our children’s happiness at home and success at work will be determined by how well they can navigate relationships and resolve difficult issues. If we write every unpleasant encounter off as bullying, we don’t prepare them well. At a minimum, we are modeling misdiagnosis…”

Here is the link: https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/parenting/wp/2018/08/16/not-all-unkindness-is-bullying-heres-why-we-need-to-teach-kids-to-differentiate/?noredirect=on&utm_term=.c8209f5d3b90

It was a great post for me (as a parent and educator) and I am certain it will be a good read for you, too!

Have a read and share your thoughts!

I look back to hearing from you.

Single Moms, Dads, Military Spouses—How do you do it?!

I have been wanting to write a blog about the people I greatly admire.  Here they are:  Single Moms.  Single Dads.  Military Spouses.

You see.  My husband travels quite a bit with his work.  He is gone between 10-20 weeks a year, many of those being multiple weeks in a row.  This year he has perhaps traveled more.  Last year, while I was pregnant with Maxwell (and when Maxwell nearly passed), he traveled a bit less.

But there is one very important thing I always keep in mind when my husband is away-He will return.

I often tell one of my best girlfriends that she is the strongest woman I know.  She is a single mother of 3 gorgeous, well-behaved, brilliant children.  She works hard.  She raises her children.  She is amazing.

I also have girlfriends whose spouses are military.  They are raising strong and brave and resilient children.  Often their spouses miss monumental moments in their lives—and yet the spouses and children march on.  They persevere.  They are the epitome of endurance and strength.

A couple times when Rich has been away, disaster has struck…One time, our basement flooded.  Another, our coal furnace went out (Do you remember that one?  If not, here it is: http://wp.me/p3Bh9m-b8 ).  Yet another, our cars died during a Siberian Winter Storm.  Have you ever lived through one?  Let me describe it—freezing cold.  Bitter wind.  Eyes hurt.  Don’t want to leave the house.  Cold!

He is also the pastor of a church—and everything seems to happen when he’s gone:  one has a heart attack; another needs to find a place to live-overnight.  Another’s marriage is on the brink.  Difficult situations.  Pastor’s wife in Poland-all alone.

Our foundation seemed in peril a few of the times he was gone.  A couple of the worst were when we were in the process of purchasing our New Life Center.   The people that we were buying it from wanted to finalize the sell but not move out.  Another, the realtor insisted on being paid upfront before the sell.  And lastly, we ran out of money—already investing all we had and then finding out we were short.  The finalization of the sell was in a couple days and according to everyone Polish we were working with, we risked losing it all if we couldn’t fulfill the contract.  I went and took out every penny we had in our bank account and prayed it would finish paying for the home (New Life Center).

And, the most tragic event in our lives, I went to the doctor’s appointment alone and found out our beautiful baby’s heart had stopped beating.  Thankfully Rich was able to make it back within the next couple days from America to Poland for me before we delivered the baby.  (I’ve also written about this loss, in case you would like to read:  http://wp.me/p3Bh9m-6B).

Yes…I have been alone.  Working.  Raising the kids.  And going through difficulties.

But—I always keep in mind, “Tomorrow will come.  Rich will return.  And my partner and helper will be there to rescue me or give me that needed day of rest.”

And during those days that seem the longest, I think of my friends-my single mother friends.  My single father friends.  My military spouse friends.  I think of them with the utmost respect and admiration.  Because not only do they work, take care of the home and kids.  But they get up each and every day and do it again.  And again.  And again.

Yes—some of the people I admire the most raise the strongest children.  And sometimes they do it all alone.